When I released my book, “Online Dating for Sensitive Women,” my primary goal was to support my fellow sisters as they embarked on the wild world of online dating. To that end, I shared six of the basic principles that I felt were important to remember while online.
The truth is, however, whether you begin your dating journey online or in person, or even if you are male or nonbinary, the same basic guidelines apply. Anyone can benefit from remembering the following:
1. You are worthy of love and happiness!
You must recognize your worth and make your needs a priority if you want to draw in a healthy relationship based on reciprocity and mutual respect.
2. Good people exist.
I hear people all the time saying that there are no good men/women. What you believe and say carries powerful energy. If you don’t believe you can meet a kind, loving partner, then your chances of doing so are very limited.
3. If someone is interested in you, they will do everything in their power to be with you.
People are not that complicated. Genuine love is not complicated either. When someone wants to get to know you better, they will make it happen. PERIOD. If someone is playing games with you, delaying responses, or putting you low on their priority list, they are not your person. We are told that relationships require work and anguish. The truth is unhealthy relationships are difficult. Healthy partnerships are easy and filled with joy.
I expand upon this powerful truth in this video:
4. Dating should always be fun!
If it stops being fun, game over. Take a break. Give yourself some time to regroup and then try again when you are ready. The only reason to date is to expand the joy in your life. If dating is causing you sadness, self-doubt, or even inconvenience, it is not worth the effort.
5. You only need to meet one person.
Online dating can feel overwhelming and competitive. With all the focus on the “likes” and the messages, it can feel like a numbers game where you need to garner as much attention as possible or you are losing. That is not true. You only need to connect with one quality person to win at love.
6. Actions speak louder than words.
There are loads of people who will tell you everything you want to hear. However, very few people will consistently display integrity, honesty, empathy, and accountability. Watch for behaviors to match a person’s words. When they do, you know you have met a genuine person. It takes at least a month for a person to show you who they are, so give everyone you meet time before you commit to them.
Despite the challenges I experienced in online dating, I am still very much a proponent of its value. Life is busy. And many of us have become isolated, making it difficult to meet new people. Online dating gives us so many more opportunities.
Just remember, the dating apps are simply tools to get you an introduction. You can use them as much or as little as you like. The real power is how you show up when using them. Please don’t get discouraged! Finding your perfect partner can take time, but the effort is worth it.
If you want more guidance, please check out “Online Dating for Sensitive Women,” or contact me for a Compassionate Coaching session. Finding a genuine, loving partnership is one of the best experiences I’ve ever had. I truly want that for you!❤️
[The 6 dating principles are excerpts from “Online Dating for Sensitive Women,” which is available on Amazon.]
Michelle Gibeault Traub is a health writer, compassionate coach, and the author of Online Dating for Sensitive Women. Her mission is to help women be their best in body, mind & spirit.
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